Thursday, June 30, 2011

Some time has passed since Prop 8…

I just finished watching 8: The Mormon Proposition, a documentary film written by Reed Cowan. It was hard for me to watch for a number of reasons: misrepresentation of the church, use of propaganda (they make church leaders look down-right villainous), and a one-sided argument. I recognize that advocacy-docs are notoriously bias, but this film had a chip on its shoulder. Googling Reed Cowan informed me that Reed Cowan was formerly LDS and he is gay. I can understand his passion for this project since the church’s position on homosexuality has affected his own life. But I digress, I don’t want to discuss the film (I think it did harm for its cause, at least in my mind). The film elicited some thought about the issue, an issue I haven’t talked about for a while. I want to express how I feel now, and how that contrasts with how I felt 3 years ago.

When proposition 8 was being lobbied for in CA, I lived in UT studying at BYU. The leaders of the church, local and higher, urged me and other LDS students to get involved in the debate and support Prop 8. I was obedient. I used the internet to express my opinion and got into a few heated debates. After getting ganged up on a few times, I got frustrated. I wrote one final blog post on the matter and haven’t really talked about it since.

Since then, a lot has happened in my life. I left Utah, spent some time abroad, and now live in upstate NY. Most importantly, I have had some time to let my thoughts and feelings develop. Ideas shared during the debates have had time to sink in, settle, and grow. During this time I changed my mind completely. I now advocate for same-sex marriage. I don’t know when this happened, it could have been during the debates back in 2008 and I was so wrapped up in the discussion that I didn’t realize it. It could have been during a conversation with my brother-in-law (whose opinion I value greatly) while trekking through the Himalayas last Summer. I think the church’s stance, and my obedience to it, didn’t allow my mind to entertain this idea and so it took a while for me to realize that I didn’t believe what I was preaching.

In my heart it just seems right that gays should be allowed to marry, and have that marriage respected. It is hard for me to write this since I know a lot of people of my faith won’t agree with me, but since my last post no longer represents how I feel, I felt it necessary to clear the air and clarify where I stand on this issue.

2 comments:

nilssen.steve@gmail.com said...

You should write a post about how you can disagree with the prophet and still sustain him. I don't mean that in a sarcastic way by any means, this is actually a question I have been struggling with for a long time. During prop 8 I always felt like gay marriage should be legal, and I found it frustrating that I could disagree with a church that I wholeheartedly believe to be true. So any thoughts on how to both disagree and yet be obedient would be interesting...

Aaron said...

I struggle with this same thought. I take comfort in knowing there were faithful men in the church who opposed the church's/prophet's position on blacks receiving the priesthood prior to 1978. The men who lead our church are not infallible. I don't think we are supposed to assume that they are.